There are a lot of memes and words of advice out there about choosing your thoughts.
Sayings such as “Your thoughts will either support you or sabotage you — Choose Wisely!” and so on.
While there is truth to those sayings at the core, I believe they are just slightly missing the mark.
Here’s the thing, and it might go against what you’ve been told. You can’t always choose your thoughts!
But you can decide which ones to ponder for a bit and which ones to let go of immediately.
Thoughts are going to enter your mind regardless if you want them to or not. We don’t really get to “choose” them.
It’s part of being human, and it’s part of life. We are going to have thoughts —and lots of them. The human brain makes over 70,000 thoughts per day!
That’s a lot of thoughts.
So take the pressure off of yourself that you have to choose only positive thoughts!
It’s normal to have negative thoughts come in. In fact, we need them. Life is a contrast of differences. It’s how we learn, navigate and grow.
And even those negative thoughts can serve a higher purpose.
For example, consider driving past a car accident involving a child or hearing about a child getting hurt. As parents, our minds will almost always go to that dark place… “what if that happened to my child?!”
Yes, it’s fear-based and not a high vibration thought. But that thought can actually serve you! Take what it’s meant to teach you, and then let it go.
Rather than letting it take you down that rabbit hole of worry and fear, ask if there is a meaning behind the thought or if it’s just the frequency of fear energy that you have tuned into.
Maybe you reflect quickly on your own child. Have you done the things you can to make her safe? Have you checked on his child seat lately? Or repeated the little reminders that teens constantly need, even though they roll their eyes when you tell them? Or perhaps an entirely new insight or reminder will pop up that will serve you or the child in your life.
And after that, it’s time to let that thought go because it only becomes fear, worry, and anxiety — and that does not serve you.
The longer you entertain, ponder, or make space for that draining thought, the tighter its grip will be on you, and the more difficult it is to let it go.
So be the steward of your own mind, of your own thoughts. They are going to flow in, which is a good thing. That means you are alive, and your mind is working just as it should.
It’s normal to have those thoughts, good, bad, and indifferent.
But now you get to be the decider. You get to make the conscious choice of deciding if you will let that thought hang around and influence your viewpoint– or if you are going to let it go and observe the next thought making its way into your mind.
So when that thought comes in that doesn’t feel so great, do what you can if there is something that can be done, if appropriate, send or share your love to the cause of the reminder, and then move on to receiving your next thought.
Learning to let go of those thoughts that drain and relishing those that guide you to living well is a process that will serve you well in making better choices and creating a better day.
Create consciously today, my friend!